Why Being Selective About The People You Spend Time With Should Be At The Top Of Your Self Care List

When we think about self care, we automatically jump to the hot bath, the massage or the good book and a hot drink. 

But, there is something that will benefit you so much more than any of these put together, something which can sometimes be a little more difficult to address. 

And that is having a think about who we spend time with. 

From the friends that we choose to the family that we don’t, every single person we spend time with has an impact on our well-being, our happiness and our joy.

Spending time with people will either raise you up or drag you down, and it’s the latter that we need to be aware of. 

It is the people that drag you down that have a hugely negative effect on your well-being.  Have you ever felt really good, met with someone and then find your mood has changed but you aren’t sure why?

These are people I like to call ‘Energy Vampires’ because they literally drain your energy just by being in their company.

They are the ones who don’t support you (even though they pretend to), the people who put you down or tell you that you aren’t good enough. The people that don’t have your back when you really need it.

This isn’t about topics of conversation, this is about energy. Energy that is transmitted and energy that is absorbed from those you spend time with.

“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with” – Jim Rohn

Whether you are aware of it or not the people surrounding you every single day have an impact on how you feel. 

Whether you feel happy and uplifted or down right depressed.

This is how strong energy from others can affect the very depths of your  personality, your happiness and your joy.

In reality, if you are surrounded by negative people, negative talk and negative attitudes you yourself will become more negative in how you think, how you act and how you feel.

One way to immediately identify these type of people is to ask yourself :

Do you feel invigorated or do you feel depleted after spending time in a certain persons company?

Those who DEPLETE your energy, these are the people you should not and I repeat should not be spending your precious time with. .

The reverse is also true. 

When you spend time with positive people who leave you feeling uplifted and happy, you will end up happier within yourself from having spent time in their company.

Your outlook will be brighter and you’ll feel so much better.

With all of this in mind, I have one piece of advice:


Now is the time to stop and collect your thoughts and feelings about the people you are surrounded by.

How do they make you feel? Do they make you feel loved, supported, good within yourself? Do you skip away with a spring in your step?

Or, do you leave with a need to tell someone about how that person acted or what they said that truly upset you? The underhand comment disguised as a compliment, the drama that continually surrounds them or the fact that they continually put others down.

Do you start off feeling great, then spending time with a certain person turns you a little miserable or down?

You must learn to identify these types of people and remove them from your tribe.

You should always think about how people make you feel.

It really is as simple as this:

Do they make you feel happy and uplifted or do they make you feel drained and down?

We all have people in our lives who, at the mere mention of their name will induce a smile or an eye roll.

The people that you really don’t want to hang out with, yet you continually do.

From here on in you must acknowledge who these people are and act accordingly.


Like everything in life you have a choice, you can choose who you spend time with and who you don’t.

You can choose self care of the highest order.

You can choose not to surround yourself with those who bring additional stress to your body and mind, stress you could be doing without. Because, quite frankly life is too short.

Make a choice today, spend less time with these people and see how your life becomes happier, more enriched and more positive.

It is time to surround yourself with people who make you feel good, people who, when you leave their company, you leave feeling happy and enriched. People who lift you up, support you and cheer for you.

Time well spent rather than time you’ll never get back.

Once you tune into these feelings it will be easy to figure out who you feel joy with and who you don’t.

This will improve your life no end.  

Surround yourself with people who are truly supportive, enjoyable to be with and who value your time as much as you value theirs.

Remove the people who don’t or actively spend less time in their company.

This is the most important form of self care that will truly change how your life plays out. It will change the levels at which your own energy resonates.

You can’t both be awesome and negative at the same time, choose your lane and dress it accordingly.

Prioritise this form of self care and you will never regret it.

In other words and to put it bluntly, let go of the sh*t that suffocates your soul.


If you would like to experience positive people who continually strive to support and cheerlead, our Private, Free, Female Only Groups The Pepper Hustler’s would love for you to come say Hi!! Click Here

Join Pepper Hustle On Demand for as little as 66c per day and change your life one day at a time through fitness, nutrition and mindset. Start Your Transformation Today!

No Comments

Post A Comment